It’s a question that many women have asked themselves at some point: why does my vagina look like roast beef?
Unfortunately, this question is often accompanied by feelings of shame and insecurity, thanks to the pervasive myth that there is a “right” way for a vagina to look.
But the truth is that vulvas come in all shapes and sizes, and there is no such thing as a “normal” or “perfect” one.
In this article, we’ll explore the reasons behind this myth, debunk some common misconceptions about vulvas, and offer advice for anyone who feels insecure about their own genitalia.
So let’s dive in and learn why your vagina is perfectly normal, no matter what it looks like.
Why Does My Vagina Look Like Roast Beef?
First of all, it’s important to understand that the term “roast beef” is a derogatory and condescending way some people describe the appearance of vulvas where the labia minora are larger than the labia majora. This means that the inner lips are bigger than the outer lips, giving the appearance of a roast beef sandwich from the side.
But having an enlarged genital is normal and not a cause for concern. Many people are born with large and often asymmetrical labia and experience no negative side effects. In fact, beef curtains can be caused by several factors, one of which is a condition known as Childhood asymmetry labium majus enlargement (CALME), in which the outer lips (labia majora) become swollen or enlarged on one side by excess tissue growth, leading to an asymmetrical appearance.
It’s also important to note that there is no correlation between the appearance of a vulva and sexual experience. Just like how a guy’s foreskin has nothing to do with his sexual experience, a woman’s labia has nothing to do with hers.
The Myth Of The Perfect Vulva
Unfortunately, due to societal pressure and the unrealistic standards set by pornography, many women feel insecure about the appearance of their vulva. They may believe that there is a “perfect” way for their genitals to look, which is simply not true. The truth is that vulvas come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and there is no one “right” or “wrong” way for them to look.
Despite this fact, more and more women are turning to labiaplasty, a serious reconstructive surgery that changes the appearance of the vulva to look more “pornstar-perfect”. While there are medical scenarios where surgery may be warranted, such as when the labia minora become very elongated and enlarged, surgery should not be pursued without careful consideration.
It’s important to remember that your vulva is unique to you, just like your fingerprints or your personality. There is no need to compare yourself to others or feel self-conscious about the appearance of your genitals. Love and appreciate your vulva for what it is, and know that anyone who would make you feel bad about it is not worth your time or energy.
The Reality Of Vulva Diversity
Apart from sex education in schools, most people are never formally taught about women’s bodies and the reproductive system. That means that what many people ‘know’ comes from porn, television, or their mates. Even women – who HAVE BODIES – and men who have had sex with and been around women have sometimes terrible ideas about which parts are where and how they behave.
The reality is that vulvas come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. They even have different smells. Many people worry that their genitalia doesn’t look “normal,” but there really is no normal. The only normal out there is what’s normal for you. And unless your normal involves pain or discomfort, everything is likely fine.
Labia can be small, large, asymmetrical, or even elongated. Some women have a bigger one (on one side or both), while others don’t. A woman’s labia are like her face; they can look all different ways and be very unique. There is not just one good kind of labia. They feel very nice to touch.
It’s important to note that vulvas come in all shapes and sizes, and no amount of sex will change their appearance. Someone believing in the roast beef theory certainly says more about their sexual experience than yours, as they’ve likely only watched porn and seen neat, trimmed labia.
Understanding The Causes Of Vaginal Appearance
The appearance of a woman’s vulva can vary greatly, and there are several factors that can contribute to this. Firstly, genetics play a significant role in the size and shape of a woman’s labia. Some women are born with larger or asymmetrical labia, while others have smaller and more even labia.
Another factor that can affect the appearance of a woman’s vulva is puberty. Just like the rest of the body, the vulva and labia can grow and change during puberty. This can result in larger or darker labia, which is completely normal and nothing to be concerned about.
It’s also important to note that sexual activity does not change the appearance of a woman’s vulva. The idea that a woman’s labia can become “stretched out” or “looser” from sex is a myth. The vagina is designed to expand and contract during sexual activity, and any changes in appearance are temporary.
Finally, it’s worth noting that societal pressures and unrealistic beauty standards can also play a role in how women perceive their own vulvas. The term “roast beef” is a prime example of how derogatory language can contribute to body shaming and insecurity.
Common Misconceptions About Vulvas
There are many misconceptions about vulvas that are perpetuated by society, media, and even some individuals. One of the most common misconceptions is that the appearance of a vulva can change after having a lot of sex. This is simply not true. Vulvas come in all shapes and sizes, and no amount of sexual activity will change their appearance. The idea that a woman with larger labia has had more sexual partners is a baseless and harmful myth.
Another misconception is that vaginas become looser the more sex a woman has. This is also not true. The vagina is made to expand and contract, and when a woman is aroused, it will relax slightly to allow for penetration. However, the muscles will contract again after sex. The only way the vagina can stretch is if a woman gives birth, but even then, most women will return to their pre-birth state within six months. Kegel exercises can also help strengthen the pelvic floor muscles.
It’s also important to note that there is no “normal” when it comes to the appearance of a vulva. They come in different shapes, sizes, and colors, and all are perfectly normal and healthy unless they cause discomfort or pain. Many people worry that their genitalia doesn’t look “normal,” but there really is no normal. The only normal out there is what’s normal for you.
Lastly, it’s important to remember that masturbation or sexual activity does not change the shape or color of your vulva or labia. Bodies – including genitals – come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, so whatever your vulva looks like is completely normal and okay.
Embracing Your Unique Genitalia: Tips For Boosting Self-Esteem
It’s completely normal to feel self-conscious about your genitalia, especially when society has set unrealistic beauty standards for them. However, it’s important to remember that your vulva is unique and beautiful just the way it is. Here are some tips for boosting your self-esteem and embracing your unique genitalia:
1. Educate yourself: Understanding the anatomy of your genitalia can help you appreciate its uniqueness. Learn about the different parts, their functions, and how they contribute to sexual pleasure.
2. Practice self-love: Take time to explore your body and appreciate its beauty. Use a mirror to get a better look at your vulva and appreciate its unique features.
3. Talk about it: Share your concerns with trusted friends or a healthcare provider. They can reassure you that your vulva is normal and offer advice on how to boost your self-esteem.
4. Avoid negative self-talk: Instead of criticizing the appearance of your vulva, focus on its function and pleasure potential. Remember that there is no “right” or “wrong” way for a vulva to look.
5. Choose positive influences: Surround yourself with people who celebrate diversity and body positivity. Avoid media that perpetuates unrealistic beauty standards for genitalia.
By embracing your unique genitalia and practicing self-love, you can boost your self-esteem and feel confident in your own skin. Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to genitalia, and every vulva is beautiful in its own way.